Performance Am I being harsh?

[passiflora]

So my daughter had a concert tonight.

She was a little nervous, didn't announce her performance as well as I would have liked. :roll:

Didn't choose her strongest piece to play.

Feeeling a bit disappointed that it didn't really showcase her talent.

She has a really important music exam coming up soon, so I should just take the positives.

1 She performed

2 She announced her performance for the first time.

3 The performance was good.

Not sure she was really relaxed and enjoyed it though :roll:

But I guess I should look on everything as a positive ( which I find hard)

and help said daughter be happy and relax which = good exam

right?

 

[IDB1]

I would find it hard to hide my disappointment and probably not follow my own advice..

But any reaction ought to be positive and criticism given gently and constructively (and later).

 

[WD Pro]

My sister plays sax for a living - still has good and bad days, you can tell with her mood

Go easy on her - she will beat herself up about it enough without any help from others !

WD

 

[highlandsflyer]

Whenever I have such a dilemma I think to myself, "How would Competitive Dad handle it?"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o1AtAQM1mNw

It is possible to frame every suggestion in positive feedback.

I tend to think through what I want to say; and adjust accordingly.

Works with the wife too!

 

[mattbrown]

Whenever I have such a dilemma I think to myself, "How would Competitive Dad handle it?"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o1AtAQM1mNw

It is possible to frame every suggestion in positive feedback.

I tend to think through what I want to say; and adjust accordingly.

Works with the wife too!

A shining example for any budding father out there.

 

[FluffyChicken]

May be 'daughter' is paranoid that 'parent' would not be impressed and so nerves go even higher.

Let her enjoy it

happy and relax


.. remind me what I said in a few years

 

[Harryburgundy]

In a nutshell, yes.
Build confidence with praise

 

[lewis1641]

When i was young i'd have felt terrible to have known i'd disapointed my dad.

 

[Carge]

+1 on the sentiment in the last post - which was kinda hard when he was the coach of the team too - he watched ALL the piggin games!

The way I look at it now - with two daughters - they have the gumption to get up there and perform in the first place - don't knock it.

And I used to get so nervous for exams etc - so I encourage, console if they feel it went well, and at a later point, gently comment.

 

[mikee]

sorry but jeezus
dont take away their childhood by heaping adult problems/goals on them
underperforming ?, they have their whole life to get it right

do you want her burnt out an resentfull at 15 ?