Divorce question...

Alison · May 16, 2013

hamster":2ut1es04 said:
Having a child is really, really hard. I bet you are both knackered. Give it time.
Life with a new baby is pretty dreadful! Things do improve.

Anybody who says that having a baby would bring you together had clearly never had a baby I remember my wife and I having screaming rows - the sleep deprivation and sheer hard work make a pressure cooker atmosphere. We rarely row now, 10 years and 2 children later.

Stick with it.

He's so right, I've four and as babies, although wonderful, took a lot out of us when it came to exhaustion and jealousy with the older ones, you often end up saying things, horrible things, that you really don't mean, if my hubby believed everything I said he'd have left me years ago, I would have left me too. Now they are older 8, 11 and 13 and we have struggled through we are getting on like a house on fire. this year will be our 21st anniversary :shock:

Alison

Chopper the ex Copper · May 16, 2013

Try lookin after a baby and a wife with MS qhile holding down a full time job if you want to know about sleep deprivation. On the plus side, all the grief and effort made me all the more determined to be a mensch and take proper care of them, where as itd probably have driven me to homocide with my ex. If you truly love them you'll man up and get on with it - if you dont then all the soft lights an candles in the world won't change it if its that broken.

Robbied196 · May 16, 2013

+1 on the don't rush into a divorce. Having a 10 month old brings most people to a mental and physical low point. Its amazing how a little bag of fun can totally wear down two adults. It becomes easy to blame the other partner, 'I'm knackered because you don't do enough!'

It will get easier, kids actually become fun at around 18 to 24 months.

If you've got family who will baby sit for a night, book a break, get pissed, shag your arses off and have one of those 'normal' nights you used to have before kids. If you can see it through you will both become stronger.

Good luck to all of you

gtRTSdh · May 16, 2013

greenstiles":3gurnzh9 said:
If me and my wife split am i responsible for any debt in her name only, like her credit cards...........crap that i'm having to ask this with a 10 month old son ......hormones ?

Just think of not seeing your boy everyday. A son needs a dad (not that a daughter doesn't). Go to relate and get some help sooner rather than later.

highlandsflyer · May 16, 2013

While that is a consideration, children are not necessarily better off in a two parent household where the parents don't get along.

Second the suggestion to go to relate; and hope you can all work this out.

I spent my early life watching my parents tear each other to pieces, it is better to put everything into resolving things sooner than later to spare the lad that.

greenstiles · May 17, 2013

Good advice from many people, it's giving me some perspective that i needed....many thank, really thank you.

Divorce question...

Alison

Chopper the ex Copper

Robbied196

Senior Retro Guru

gtRTSdh

Senior Retro Guru

highlandsflyer

Retro Wizard

greenstiles

Old School Grand Master

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