Aspergers traits ?....my odd behavior

[dyna-ti]

Last night i considered leaving the forum for good.Felt the jokes were a bit cutting.Maybe ,maybe not but this affects me deeply. :?

I cant continue following this thread.

 

[greenstiles]

dyna-ti, I have had thoughts like that too, but it's too easy to take someone wrong on here, after all it's like writting letters to each other without tone of voice and facial expressions. I got someone wrong the other day because they don't write like me, i have given them an apology they were actually trying to support some of the things i said.

As for pee taking i can really take some peoples comments as real insults, but i think at the end of the day most don't mean any long lasting mischief, it's very hard convaying speech over the net.

I've decided not to take thing to heart as much and put it mostly down to comunication misunderstanding and frustration. Please stay. This is only the general off topic part of the site.

 

[Rusty Scrubber]

 

[greenstiles]

Well said.

 

[silverclaws]

Thought I'd list a few to see if anyone understands or does this stuff too ???

1.
At a party I just stand and am quite happy to stare about and not talk to anyone all night and find it strange how people just burst inti instant conversations....and keep them going !

I have learnt to 'pretend' in one to ones at times and can pull it off quite well, but i'm just parroting.

2.
At meetings or courses, when it's lunch time and people group/herd together I go off and find a place without people.
I got caught in a bus stop the other day on a lunch break, i'd rather eat in a bus stop than be in the group.......i could do it, but it's not my first choice.

3.
When people tell me jokes I usually don't get them (unless i've heard them/silmilar before)......my sence of humour sometimes completly dissapears.

4.
I stare into peoples faces trying to work out what their saying / building up to/ at times and it's like there's a time delay between facial movements and hearing and processing words.

This is making me sound strange, but i can pass as being pretty normal if i try and over compensate my 1st response.

Oh and just a last quickie, give me a knife and fork and i'll swap them between hands about 20 times while eating a plate of dinner. I usually eat with just a spoon or just a big fork, no knife.

http://youtu.be/1UNXMaNfiYA

and my choice of eating iron;

http://youtu.be/Nujf8gK_aUQ

 

[silverclaws]

Also for the cynic ;

http://youtu.be/QFt2aZvg3qE

 

[greenstiles]

I need a spork (in titainium if poss) it will cut out the confusion between , fork type dinner or spoon type dinner, cheers.

As for the other clip, makes me realize how much i've compensated over the years. I'd say 90% i totally related to. I'm not convincing my self of anything but whycan i relate so much to it ?

Loud noises but ace hearing , smells, details, tick, don't liked to be touched, tick, mt wife has to give me warning ! Can remember now being playgrounds and not knowing what to do, being called weirdo at about 9 cos i didn't play. Later in adult life, just hidding away apart from work. And definatly asking people emmbarresing stuff, not to insult them, i just wanted to know the truth, or say the obvious (i keep that in check if i can)

To be honest surprised i ever got married (only 5 1/2 years ago)

But there is one thing that doesn't fit......i can be empathetic to some people, well people in physical distress or exibiting signs of mental distress. That doen't fit does it ? Maybe i just notice something that needs to be fixed.

 

[sylus]

I remember working at a motorcycle dealers. It was run/owned by two blokes..one was probably the best boss I've ever had and the other..I'm sure even his own kids hated him.

I remember telling him he was to people skills what adolf hitler was to judiasm...not long after that things rose to a point I decided to go work for honda in swindon..anyway

before I left I had always wanted to crap in the bad bosses desk drawer..I don't know why I just did...the good boss walked in as me kecks were around my ankles and said what on earth are you doing????? I told him I was going to crap in his partners desk

he said he understood and many times he wished he could but would I mind not doing it as they share an office


so my question is ....am I aspergic or do I just like brussel sprouts

 

[greenstiles]

???

 

[Neil]

I remember working at a motorcycle dealers. It was run/owned by two blokes..one was probably the best boss I've ever had and the other..I'm sure even his own kids hated him.

I remember telling him he was to people skills what adolf hitler was to judiasm...not long after that things rose to a point I decided to go work for honda in swindon..anyway

It's a funny thing, but I always look back at some of the managers I had earlier on in my career, and in some ways, wish I was still working for them now.

Not saying they were all good or perfect - but a lot of what I hate about modern working life, many wouldn't have been quite so easily emasculated. One particular boss I had - not much in the way of personnel skills, not tactful, you may often disagree with, he'd kick your arse if you did something wrong, or weren't good / clever enough (and if sustained would have just moved you out of his team). But there was something good about it all, too. I'd happily socialise with him - even if there may be instances where I'd have a row with him - we'd soon put it behind us, and it would have been said. And knowing you had to perform, you did - there was no being officious and talking about training courses, or not having had your hand held.

He was most definitely not PC - and quite often sexist, where it concerned work and ability (ie he wasn't a total male chauvinist, he loved women, just didn't particularly want to have many / any working for him - it wasn't a thing about relating to women, he just steadfastly had some beliefs about women and certain types of work - other than that, though, and he kinda reminded me of Bulldog from Frasier where women were concerned).

As time has gone on, and I've moved on, things and management styles have changed. Managers seem to have become pragmatic and acquiesced to many things, that I wonder whether some from a previous era would have tolerated.

As an example - there once was a time - say if somebody from outside of your area complained about somebody in your own area, the manager would have dealt with it, but shown some defence and support for his staff. He may then of kicked ass, afterwards, in private, but to outside of his area, he would have shown support for his staff. These days, it seems quite different, managers just seem to cave in to things like that - because it seems much easier to hassle your own people, than be strong and firm with others or superiors.

Now I realise I've used the male pronouns in that paragraph, but that's largely because in that early part of my career, and to a certain degree, now, managers have been largely male (with a couple of exceptions for indirect managers) - it's not a sexist thing, these days I tend to hate male managers just as much as I hate female managers - I'm strictly equal opportuinities when it comes to manifesting the hate...