Viagra.

[videojetman]

A man went the doctor's office to ask for a triple dose of Viagra.
The doctor told him that he couldn't allow him a triple dose.
'Why not?' asked the man.
'Because it's not safe,' replied the doctor.
'But I need it really bad,' said the man.

'Well, why do you need it so badly?' asked the doctor.

The man said, 'My girlfriend is coming into town on Friday, my ex-wife will
be here on Saturday, and my wife is coming home on Sunday. Can't you see?
I've got to have a triple dose.'

The doctor finally relented saying, 'All right, I'll give it to you, but you
have to come in Monday morning so that I can check you to see if there are
any side effects.'

On Monday afternoon the man dragged himself into the doctor's office..his
right arm in a sling.

The doctor asked, 'Good gawd! What happened to you?'

The man said, 'No one showed up.'

 

[Alison]

Groan :facepalm:

Alison

 

[argonsixar]

Drunk staggers out of a bar and bumps into a priest.
"Hallo my good man, I am Jesus Christ", he says.
The priest replies "dont blaspheme, you are just a man"

OK " I can prove it", says the drunk " follow me back in the bar"
As they walk in the barman says , "Jesus Christ are you back again ? "

Boom boom

 

[feetabix]

Pinocchio complains to his dad that his sex life has been ruined by splinters from his wooden penis.......handing him a piece of sandpaper his father explains that before he goes to his girlfriends he should rub the end of his old fella using the paper in a circular motion, and up and down his shaft.......

The following weekend his father asks Pinocchio "how did it go with your girlfriend?"........to which Pinocchio replies.......


"What girlfriend?"

 

[Lysander]

*quietly opens the cloakroom door whilst shaking head reproachfully*