They do say that honest is the best policy...

[RustyGold]

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Heap-of-J...1168229522?pt=UK_Bikes_GL&hash=item3cced6ec92

"Heap of Junk" Mountain Bike

Its been kept outside a train station for months so has plenty of rust on the wheel rims and various other places. It's ideal if you need a bike to leave in public places as no-one is likely to want to steal it.It features screechy brakes that serve as an excellent audible warning when pedestrians are in your way and lurid green paintwork and brake cables that keep you visible in gloomy weather.

Oh I do enjoy an eBay seller who's brutally honest/humorous about their merchandise .