So, voting time is here - what's your choice?
legrandefromage":90p1eddq said:
warpedboy2":90p1eddq said:I posted this on the forum last year, the day after I got my p7.....
This morning, as the weather was so nice I thought I would take the long route to work, and get to know my new "friend".
The first part of my commute is a long steady climb out of Brighton, up to the a27. The traffic was bad as the school run was in full swing, plenty of idiots in boxes not looking where they were going.
Once past the roundabout, things start to get prettier, over to my left I had a hazy view of the coast over the Worthing. On a clear day, the Isle of Wight can be clearly seen in the distance. And over on my right, the South Downs. Mist was hanging about in the valleys, making the hilltops look like islands.
After a while the cycle path up to Devils Dyke veers off to the left, at last giving me freedom to enjoy my ride without traffic. The sweat is starting to flow now as I am still climbing from sea level. I pass a few dog walkers, and exchange greetings. Everyone is in a good mood today.
A few miles later, I reach devils dyke, where I turn left onto the South Downs Way, where the fun really begins Cool The track starts of grass until the first gate, where the trail starts to incline downwards. As speed increases my shins are splashed with dew from the wet grass. Suddenly the track splits three ways, each with loose rocks and gulleys. It is fun to be riding a rigid bike again!
Now, I'm climbing again. The trail now is a jeep track. Traction is limited on the loose surface, so I spin my way to the crest of the hill, before another downhill begins. I fly by a heard of cows, most of which do not even look at what is causing the commotion. The track takes a turn to the left, and the rigid forks track perfectly into the berm that has formed next to the trail.
After pausing at the bottom to have a refreshing drink, I look over towards Brighton. It is all but obscured under a shroud of haze. Only the tallest buildings can be seen poking there heads above the morning smog.
I clip back in and begin the last climb up towards the mast at Truleigh Hill. This is proper mint sauce country, complete with a bi-plane making its way to Shoreham Airport. It's really warm now as I crest the hill, my back is drenched, and drops fall from the pads on my helmet, splashing onto the top tube.
At the top, I click down a few gears, I readiness for the biggest decent of the day. I pick up speed past the youth hostel. I do the obligatory little jump off the man hole, and i'm grinning like a loon. The track turns into tarmac for a mile or so, but it's really fast, and i'm doing 40 mph now, the wind cooling me down after all the exertion.
Then I leave the South Downs Way, and plunge down a rocky loose decent, though the trees, and down into the Adur Valley. A few miles of tarmac now through Upper Beeding, and the outskirts of Steyning.
Once through Steyning, I'm on the Downslink Trail towards my destination. For the first mile or so, it's still tarmac, and rounding a corner I see someone with what looks like a young pony. I slow down to walking pace and as I get closer I see that it's a baby Alpaca. I stop, and talk with owner, and of course give the four month old Alpaca (who is called Petula) plenty of fuss. Nice.
After passing the stinky sewage works, I'm back onto the rough stuff along a farm road for a mile or so, before the trail turns sharply to the right, decending though fields of stubble. The sound of the gravel pinging off the downtube frightens a flock of rooks, which noisely take to the sky, and swirl around like black bin bags in a wind.
Then the last few miles along a disused railway track. Easy going now, the trees giving me shelter from the now suprisingly hot sun.
One final uphill and I wheel into Henfiled 16 miles later. And best of all, the kettles on
NeilM":90p1eddq said:
wookiee":90p1eddq said:The Naked Running Man...
So it was a crisp, sunny, Saturday morning in February. Not many of those around I think, so I call up my riding buddies to go out for a tread. Much to my dismay they are all in one way or another unable to come out to play! Dammit! Oh sod it I have the morning free of child care so I need to go out! So I sling my leg over my old 1993 Marin Eldridge and set of for my local trails.
I get to the spot and set off for the "roller coaster" section full of joy and innocence. About 15 mins into the ride I hear my phone in my backpack ringing. Fearing a "get home now" call from my missus, I stopped to answer it. I get there too late, but just about getting the phone out. Its then I notice the battery is all but dead. Oh well, selfishly at least it gives me an excuse not to have got "that come home call!"
Its then I notice some thing out of the corner of my eye, someone else out here in the woods in the middle of nowhere! But this is no fellow biker nor an enthusiastic rambler... Noo no no this is a balaclava clad 6ft 3 stacked running man, and he is butt naked but for a pair of stout black boots! He's about 20 meters away when he clocks me and like a startled rabbit he skids to a stop and runs back from where he came from!
Sooo what do I do? I pedal as fast as my aged legs would let me in the opposite direction! After a couple of mins I think it must be someone p**sing about or a dare? I try to rationalise it and carry on. I get to the "roller coaster" section, a series of 20ft bomb craters. Wooping in and out great fun...until after the 2nd on the up of the next crater my chain snaps! Being the crap boyscout that I am, I have nothing to fix it up!
My mind slams back to the balaclava wearing naked man...me here in the woods...alone...broken bike chain...miles from anywhere...dead phone! Its like a freaking movie! And I'm talking about the one with the banjo's! And now with "squeal piggy squeal" ringing in my ears! What to do, only one thing for it walk back the way I came and out of the woods...
So I'm a bit gittery and have wrapped the broken chain around my right fist "just in case!" yeah right! And start the walk back out, scouting bushes and flinching with every noise! After about 20mins I start to relax when from around the corner springs "Naked Running Man!" This time he chose to loose the balaclava and was just a couple of meters away when he turned on his heals and shot off again! I clocked his face and the huge dagger tattoo on his back and the fact that he was completely hairless! :shock: perhaps he was a road biker!
Anyway I get out of the woods and feel the need to get the law involved. I wait till another fellow biker came past stopped him and asked to use his phone. I called the cops saying what I had seen thanked the biker and headed of for the nearest pub! Made a call to the missus who btw is amazing and she came out to pick me up!
A couple of hours later much to my surprise the cops called back! They had trekked through the woods to the spot I described, and had in fact found the "Naked Running Man" and arrested him! They then came round and I gave a statement and later I attended an identity parade! I know!!! I had to ask number 3 to "run about a bit" to decide if it was him! But I picked a guy out, it was the right guy, and he went to court and was fined and banned from any woodland for 5 years!
So the moral of the tale...if you go down to the woods today you wouldn't believe your eyes!
A true story! For real!...
Wookiee
