Divorce

[maverick]

Hello RB world.

Her indoors has decided to call last orders on our marriage after 16 years.

I won't bother to explain the reasons as they are difficult to think about and are currently causing me much pain.

I need some simple pointers, tips, advice etc for what to consider in our separation and divorce.

I know its not an easy subject to discuss, but I know that I am not the first and won't be the last, and I'm dam sure I'm not the only one going through this kind of S**t at the moment who frequents the RB pages.

Any and all advice is welcome.

Thanks.

 

[The History Man]

Children? First consideration.

 

[highlandsflyer]

Re:

Consult a lawyer. Don't wait. Advice from a bunch of middle ages folks who waste their time and money on old bikes is probably not what you really need. Mediation is the key, whether the split is irreconcilable or not.

Children are resilient, so make your needs the primary concern. Only when your needs are met can children be happy with the end result.

 

[tintin40]

I was told by a lawyer. Don't get one as it will drag on a cost a ££££ I did my own cost £350 and took 3 months. The lawyer told me you both have to agree and keep to the agreement.

 

[Harryburgundy]

Re:

Been there twice. Hard times mate, sorry to hear it.
First consideration is obviously if you have any children and their age and stage.
Next is how you think you and your partner are going to deal with this. Lawyers get very expensive.

 

[RickTheUncivil]

sad times. Best advice I can offer (having watched friends go through it rather than be there myself) is try to be reasonable with eachother. If you can remain civil it makes everything easier and compromise / agreement can be reached. If not then hard times acomin, sorry.

best wishes

 

[stew-b]

DIY one worked well for me,£350 or something like that but will only work if there are no kids and both are amicable about house profits etc.

 

[kenaltobelli]

Re:

Best advice I can give is be cool and listen ,don't say too much,
All so don't go in for heated arguments
You make it through the storm and out into the sunshine its great.

 

[jimo746]

Re:

If you're still on talking terms then it helps, a lot. You might be able to work most of the issues surrounding the divorce (children/finances etc) out between the two of you and keep the lawyers involvement to a minimum (which is in the best interests of all involved really).

Have a good look at the Wikivorce website.

If things have really gone bad between you then get legal advice, to protect yourself and find out what options you have.

 

[highlandsflyer]

Re:

Most law forms will offer an initial free consultation.

Even a half hour with an expert can save you thousands long term.