Some help please? Hawk Hammer e-stay - pickup only near Augsburg, Germany

Perhaps one of my German RetroBike homies can help get this for me?

I guess it would help if I include the link!
Y'think?

incorrigible said:

I guess it would help if I include the link!
Y'think?

https://www.ebay-kleinanzeigen.de/s-anzeige/hawk-hammer-mtb-mountainbike-studentenrad-cruiser-90er-hardtail/1450562122-217-7522

Click to expand...

Wow! Thanks!

I was actually kinda sorta kidding somewhat....(hmmm......now where's that "embarrassed" emoji.......it was just here a couple of weeks ago.........)

So.........I hear the weather's just lovely in Augsburg this time of year..........sunshine & sunglasses weather

Hey, you literally asked us to put the facepalm emoji there.

Click to expand...

I merely obliged.

I-i-i-i-it's ba-a-a-a-ack!


OK, what kind of tap-dance do I need to do here to persuade someone to get this for me?
Let me know what it's gonna take for me to get this and I'll do my best to make it happen.

I can take care of your "dirty work", and I can even make it look like an accident.
I can make prank telephone calls to your enemies and leave flaming bags of ....er...."offerings" on their doorstep for you.
I can streak (naked) through the publicly televised event of your choosing with your company's logo proudly emblazoned on my generously proportioned mid-section.
If nothing else, I can be available to return the favor anytime.
Thanks in advance, you wonderful person you!

OK, if it's a tap-dance you want, here ya go:


You may well recognize my avatar...
...and please go easy on my creation; I've just recently given him life, so he's still learning.

If you're in Augsburg, you know it's currently 7 degrees C. Not exactly favorable weather.
BUT, in the mountains of sunny Southern California, it's currently a balmy 25 degrees C; absolutely PERFECT MTB weather.
SO, if you DO decide to take that vacation to SoCal, I'm sure it would be no problem to take this bike along with you.
...just sayin'...


If tap-dancing and persuasion don't work, I'll try hypnosis next, so stay tuned.

OK, truth be told, I'm not at all familiar with hypnosis.
I just tried using Google Translate to message the seller because I don't speak German.
I also ran the translation back thru Google Translate to be sure that this doesn't happen"


I hope I can convince the seller to make an exception to ship to me in USA vs. trying to sell locally.
Wish me luck!

It's obvious to me that the ancient MTB gods have gathered together to taunt me mercilessly.



Why yes! I can see them now posing just as they appear in their constellation in the Western Hemisphere!
There's Toppus Tubius; He’s always trying to bust my balls.
And of course, his inconsiderate brother, Downus Tubius, who always seems to leave my water bottle covered in whatever disagreeable filth I happen to be riding through that day.
Behind him is the lovely Seatstaythia, bless her heart, who never fails to support my ass.
Of course that's the rather shifty Gripshiftocles over there speaking with Knobbus Tyrus, who really digs the dirt, and the unconventional Coggus Biopacius, who speaks of my somewhat erratic cycling patterns.
Hiding in the background there are Spokius, Crankus Armelius, and Droppernicus Postocles, all of whom have important jobs, yet they all laugh at me and conspire to prevent me from laying hands upon the object of my unabashed ardor.

Oh, Great Shimano's ghost, why must they torment me? For the love of Tangus Chromolius and all things XT, someone please help me before I lose touch with reality........
...........er.................so soon since my recent break with reality.......
...........ah................not that I ever had much of a keen grip on reality.....................
................................Reality? Bah! Over-rated.

Hmmmm, he pondered craftily while rubbing his hands together in a sinister fashion. Maybe if I simply increased my offer to the seller.............<insane laughter follows>