I'm not sure I'm just being too judgemental

Charlieboy28":2nez4ygg said:

Isaac_AG":2nez4ygg said:

There is this family in the village and my two youngest are out playing with with one of their brood and I don't like it. I find them vulgar they swear all the time, they are the sort that laugh and encourage their children when they learn to say f**k before they say mum and think there is no point in education "cus it never gets you nowhere anyway" and violence sorts everything out. this is probably irrelevant but they have loads of dogs in wire cages and in the house that poop everywhere and never get taken for walks, their house stinks of chip fat, smoke and doggy doings.

I hate it when they come round but wonder if I'm being unreasonable and just thinking I'm better than them because I live differently

Alison

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you know Alison, it might be you makes the difference for these kids, by allowing them to come to your house and play with your children you give them different role models, higher expectations, you can show them patience and kindness, show them the rules routines and boundaries and the behaviour expected of them while at your home.

It might enable them to lift their heads out of the gutter enough for them to see that there is a different way of life available to them that what they see from their parents and stop them following in their footsteps.

i have worked with many families like this, sometimes ,just sometimes one of them breaks away and does good, and it is always down to some adult outside of the family that belives in them a teacher youth worker relative or neighbour.

so be like jesus and suffer them little children

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This ^^
The only way to change out society is to educate the kids. Move away like some have suggested and your kids will just face the same problems in 20 years time (or whenever they have children!)

The travelling folk are essential to the Highlands. They do much seasonal estate and farm work that locals are not interested in or skilled to undertake. The council policy is tolerance, and they take any prejudicial behaviour towards the travelling community very seriously indeed. The appearance of the caravans is as fond to me as the geese and the swallows, so many great times I have had with the merry pranksters.

I have been in the OPs situation, and my approach was to befriend the family. You get out what you put in with people, and you have already shown great tolerance and understanding allowing your kids the friends they have made in spite of your misgivings.

When I first left home I rented a flat and not far from me were a couple that lived in absolutely squalid conditions, they had a couple of dogs that used to poop on the balcony outside the French doors that these flats had off the living room and they never cleaned it so their house stank to high heaven. They never washed, ever, or brushed their teeth, at least the other family of whom I speak do do that, and they were filthy and so was everyone they knew. Around dinner time they started to turn up at my flat, I hated inviting them in but I did and often fed them, which is of course why they came round at dinner time :roll: normally they'd fry chips in beef dripping and that was their diet everyday of their lives until I turned up. I did eventually rent a flat in a much better area and lost contact with them, immediately to be honest

I just don't know what happens to people to get like this.

Alison

You shouldn't have to force yourself to like anyone..........

Nothing will prevent it aside of stop having kids or the world coming to its end!