'Karl, Karl, Karl' shouted the good lady, 'i need you now'. It's a bit early for that i thought, the kids are only just in bed!
A quick investigation reveals not a fruity wife but a long eared brown bat sitting on a shelf looking quite disgruntled.
Even had to wake the kids up to show them it was that exciting.. I remember seeing a dead pipistrelle when i was young but this was ace.
I rang 'The Bat Line' (i hope the other end was attached to a red phone) and left a message and then the RSPCA, who were great. Gloves on, pick it up, stick it on a teatowel and then hang this on a washing line because they like to take off from the perpendicular apparently. I got the gloves on, picked the bat up which then shot off from nowhere near the perpendicular.
A brief 'Keystone Cops / Benny Hill' style chase around the house ensued whilst the kids laughed themselves silly. Eventually i took a slip catch that David Gower would have been proud of and the bat was free to go!
What an evening