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PostPosted: Sat Aug 10, 2013 6:09 am 
Old School Grand Master
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Joined: Sun Sep 05, 2010 1:10 am
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Location: Heathfield, East Sussex
Seriously Al, you ride a bike and you have a sense of humour; what more do you need?

Values change as you get older; the shallow opportunism of youth gives way to the understated empathy of middle age, and we are much the better for it!

So far I have only made it to one Mayhem, and that a couple of years ago, but a nicer bunch of people you couldn't hope to meet 8)


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PostPosted: Sat Aug 10, 2013 9:13 am 
Gold Trader / PoTM Winner / RB Rider
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Joined: Tue Feb 26, 2013 6:26 pm
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Location: 54 Festive Road Winchcombe GLOUCS Yarp...
I went to mayhem last year and was surprised by how friendly, accepting (and ugly) everybody was.

They got better as the evening went on........ :lol:


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PostPosted: Sun Aug 11, 2013 6:24 pm 
Retro Guru
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Joined: Sat Apr 02, 2011 11:16 am
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Location: Camden, London
1 in 5 children bullied on line per NSPCC,

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-23654329


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PostPosted: Sun Aug 11, 2013 10:42 pm 
Old School Grand Master
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Location: Heathfield, East Sussex
Parents have to take a share of the blame; most don't give a t*ss where their kids are or what they are doing, so long as they can watch their Soaps in peace!

As for the tragic case at the heart of the OP, the whole of Society in general has to shoulder part of the blame; the poor kid was in misery because of her eczema at the most vulnerable stage of her development...

...her parents probably told her she was 'beautiful' no matter so she would have believed they didn't understand or take her seriously and turned to the Web for help and advice, with the all too common results that do not surprise 'us' but would have been mortifying to a teenager with no 'life' skills.

Her 'note' simply said 'Will it ever get any better?' which is what leads me to suspect she didn't actually mean to kill herself rather get her parents to take her seriously?

The whole of Society is at fault for perpetuating the shallow, marketing lead, mind set that says 'looks are everything...'

...having spent a good few years photographing professional models in the studio I am more than qualified to say that these impressionable teenagers would be shocked to discover just how plain top models really are; they have to be to allow the makeup artists to do their thing.

My ex-Step Mothers younger sister has been on the cover of Vogue several times (one of the few) but without makeup she has the ruddy complexion of a farmers wife!

What with all the Z-list wannabes, Wags and the likes of Katie Price distorting vulnerable and impressionable kids' perception of what values count I can't see an end to it any time soon...

...money talks :|


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 12, 2013 12:03 am 
retrobike rider
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Location: Runcorn, cheshire.
The most important things we can give our children are love & self esteem.
which is something that was in short supply when i was growing up.


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 12, 2013 12:51 am 
Karma Queen / Cake Meisterin
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We_are_Stevo wrote:
Parents have to take a share of the blame; most don't give a t*ss where their kids are or what they are doing, so long as they can watch their Soaps in peace!|


Surely that's very few, I don't know what my son's friends parents watched but I won't stand for soaps in my house Grrr, although I did let my oldest daughter 13 try out Holyoaks and fortunately she thought it was crap and decided not to follow her friends, relief :roll: not all parent's of suicide children were engrosses in soaps as their children suffered.

I think all of my son's friends parents since moving from Nottinghamshire to North Yorkshire really care about their children's welfare apart from our neighbors who happen to think "Whats's the point in education....." I live in a housing association property, funny there are 6 houses by the authority here, amongst a village almost owned by the village idiot :D and other than us have the same what's the point attitude except 2 others, two own their houses, bought them from the authorities, now, one has very young children and the other now has his daughter living back with him and his grandchild, who to be honest is a bit spoiled, just want's to get her granddad to shout at anyone who does not want to play with her.

I know what it is like not to be taken seriously, not all parents are to blame though and it is very hard as a parent to know what to do, I know I wanted my parents to do something and unless you have Choppers granddad to beat them up :roll: you are left with if your parents say anything the more bullied you are. I tried that and not only did I get laughed at by the school kids I got mocked by my teacher, only the head was sympathetic but seamed as powerless as me :cry: I was so scared by a teacher who kept me back I said to him " If you come any closer i'll jump out the window" He went to close the window and I ran out the door, I was really afraid of abuse, I knew the signs. Funny my mum told me that the head had no real evidence, beside many complaints, to fire him, bloomin Catholics, sorry to others but...

Sometimes it's not the parents but a child trying to deal with problems that they cannot truly express, I know when things were screwing up for me I had to write to my GP after 4 appointments before she took me seriously, often hearing is not always realizing, I am guilty of that myself :oops:

I wish I could do the right thing and on the whole I hope I do but I will make mistakes and I hope my children do not suffer in this way because of it.

Alison


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 12, 2013 1:05 pm 
Old School Grand Master
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Location: Heathfield, East Sussex
Al, I was generalising...

...and now it turns out that the girl sent most of the derogatory messages to herself; and the parents were aware of this!


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PostPosted: Thu Aug 15, 2013 1:22 am 
Karma Queen / Cake Meisterin
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Joined: Thu Jul 27, 2006 10:02 pm
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We_are_Stevo wrote:
Al, I was generalising...

...and now it turns out that the girl sent most of the derogatory messages to herself; and the parents were aware of this!


Sorry all I find is reports from the Daily Mail, is that not like believing in the Sunday Sport.

Aren't they just trying to make teens into slags whatever their situation.

The Daily Mail care nothing but ratings.

Alison


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PostPosted: Thu Aug 15, 2013 6:53 am 
Gold Trader / Special
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Joined: Wed Aug 27, 2008 3:48 pm
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Location: Leicestershire
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article ... sk-fm.html


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PostPosted: Thu Aug 15, 2013 7:11 am 
retrobike rider
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Joined: Sat Apr 17, 2010 7:19 pm
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Location: Runcorn, cheshire.
the bigger picture here is there is a big problem with mental health.
young people need the nurturing of good loving parents.
surely hannahs parents must must hold some accountability ?
kids don't kill themselves if they have high self esteem.
the fact remains a child is dead.
r.i.p. hannah.


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