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PostPosted: Tue Aug 06, 2013 4:25 pm 
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Chute55uk wrote:
yes that's what I meant.
of course the original reason I started this thread is the father is calling for ask.com to be taken down, claiming it is the reason this happened but immediately jumps on the biggest cause of misery this modern world can produce and cites social media as the reason.
if it wasn't so tragic the irony would be laughable


Social media and much of mobile comms are big enablers for bullying, though - more areas where it can go on, largely unsupervised or monitored.


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 06, 2013 4:29 pm 
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Neil wrote:
Chute55uk wrote:
yes that's what I meant.
of course the original reason I started this thread is the father is calling for ask.com to be taken down, claiming it is the reason this happened but immediately jumps on the biggest cause of misery this modern world can produce and cites social media as the reason.
if it wasn't so tragic the irony would be laughable


Social media and much of mobile comms are big enablers for bullying, though - more areas where it can go on, largely unsupervised or monitored.

I know I'm an ambassador for the child exploitation and online protection centre (CEOP) and deliver their thinkuknow programme to school children.
don't get me wrong Neil, I'm in complete agreement with you I just struggle sometimes with this whole dog eat dog world, that's all.


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 06, 2013 4:31 pm 
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sorry I dont mean dog eat dog, I mean I struggle with the concept that people think its ok to tell someone to go and die, I had someone sent me a message on the xbox telling me he hopes I get cancer, all because I shot him in a game where the object is to shoot people (call of duty)


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 06, 2013 5:40 pm 
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my older brother was a cruel bully to me and my younger brother.
his body is now ruined through drug addiction.
as they say in life, what goes around comes around.
i like to think even though i suffered a fair amount of bullying in my younger years,
i have managed to rise above the fear & pain.
and every day is a victory to me now.


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 06, 2013 6:03 pm 
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Chute55uk wrote:
so this girl sadly kills herself because she was being bullied online after asking for advice about excema and self harming.
first thing her dad does? puts it on f**king facebook :facepalm:
R.I.P. Hannah Smith


glad to see i'm not the only one who thought that.


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 06, 2013 6:07 pm 
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I'm sorry but I do not understand the phenomenon that is 'cyber bullying?'

Don't live your life on Social Media, then you don't have to experience it; I hardly ever even bother with YouTube because of the purile commentary which accompanies virtually every video... :x

And yes, I do know what it is like to be bullied; between the ages of about 8 to 15 I was picked on because of the 'posh' way I talked (my mother was a GPO trained telephonist), because I was one of the two tallest kids in school (the other was the school bully), because my mother dressed me in short trousers a whole year after the majority of other kids started wearing longs, because she also dressed me in sandals and white ankle socks in the summer (this was the mid-60's BTW...), and not least because, due to my Franco/Gaelic hereditary, I have always been sallow skinned and tan in a warm wind...

...despite being Caucasian therefore I have experienced every petty, nasty, hurtful aspect of racism you can think of!

Until I snapped at the age of 15 and the lad who was picking on me actually thought I was going to kill him in front of his friends in the classroom!

I haven't been picked on or bullied since; and yes Neil, it was a better world when Choppers Grandad could dish out a bit of instant retribution and 'The Gene Genie' wasn't just a fictional character... :|


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 06, 2013 6:29 pm 
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We_are_Stevo wrote:
I'm sorry but I do not understand the phenomenon that is 'cyber bullying?'

Don't live your life on Social Media, then you don't have to experience it; I hardly ever even bother with YouTube because of the purile commentary which accompanies virtually every video... :x

And yes, I do know what it is like to be bullied; between the ages of about 8 to 15 I was picked on because of the 'posh' way I talked (my mother was a GPO trained telephonist), because I was one of the two tallest kids in school (the other was the school bully), because my mother dressed me in short trousers a whole year after the majority of other kids started wearing longs, because she also dressed me in sandals and white ankle socks in the summer (this was the mid-60's BTW...), and not least because, due to my Franco/Gaelic hereditary, I have always been sallow skinned and tan in a warm wind...

...despite being Caucasian therefore I have experienced every petty, nasty, hurtful aspect of racism you can think of!

Until I snapped at the age of 15 and the lad who was picking on me actually thought I was going to kill him in front of his friends in the classroom!

I haven't been picked on or bullied since; and yes Neil, it was a better world when Choppers Grandad could dish out a bit of instant retribution and 'The Gene Genie' wasn't just a fictional character... :|


The think is practically all your friends if your a teen today are on Facebook or the equivalents and if you don't join in then you can be seriously left out of friendship groups, and you might say "well they're not friends if they can't take you not being on social media sites" and their friends may still stay somewhat friends but probably not as close as if you are. My 20 year old communicates more through Facebook than anything else, if you canny catch him by text you most certainly can on Facebook. Teens and twentysomethings need this media, it's today's thing, just like trying to be a pupil in a family with no computer, it's plainly disadvantaging. Bulling will exist in all forms, whether out at school or online, it's too simple to say well don't use social media if you don't want to be bullied, don't have a mobile if you don't want to be bullied, you can't say don't go to school if you don't want to be bullied can you, these are what children of today need to keep up with their friends and they should be able to use them safely and not be forced off because of some little sh*t.

I don't know the answer but I know it's not a simple one.

Alison


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 06, 2013 6:31 pm 
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Chute55uk wrote:
sorry I dont mean dog eat dog, I mean I struggle with the concept that people think its ok to tell someone to go and die, I had someone sent me a message on the xbox telling me he hopes I get cancer, all because I shot him in a game where the object is to shoot people (call of duty)


Thing is, though, I can see the distinction between the keyboard warrior, and those that pursue and bully others. Maybe I'm wrong - but I see a difference between those that say bold things because they're behind a keyboard, and there's likely no comeback, to those that hound and bully somebody - it may be a subtle distinction, but it's a distinction, nevertheless - obnoxious, as opposed to predatory.

I think social media and the internet has just made things more pervasive and exposed. In the past, for a child who maybe was bullied at school - outside of school, with other friends or doing other things, they would most likely not have this other time affected by bullying. But with so much more of life being about use of the internet, social media, people are more exposed and visible, and less shielded or have parts of their life less exposed to it.

Fortunately, for young kids (least I hope so) the internet and social media, mobile comms, aren't factors in that part of their lives, yet - so for kids at this younger age, one would hope they've only got the more traditional bullying to worry about.

It's an age-old problem, though. And there's not one panacea. Sure, some might say "fight back" but that's not for everybody, nor is everybody capable of that - and if technology is supposed to be improving our lives, surely there's a point that it should just make it even more open season for bullies to have many more avenues to make somebody's life a misery.

Plenty talk - and say they take it seriously - but in my opinion and experience, the only thing that matters, is action, when somebody complains - now sure, that can be a double-edged sword, but words, schmords - when people who are being bullied reach out, something needs to happen - else they won't reach out, because there will be no point, and more chance it'll just make things worse.

We_are_Stevo wrote:
I haven't been picked on or bullied since; and yes Neil, it was a better world when Choppers Grandad could dish out a bit of instant retribution and 'The Gene Genie' wasn't just a fictional character... :|


Maybe it was a better time - that's not what I've said - just that the Genie won't go back in the bottle. Problem is - society can't just be rewired or rewound like that.

And the other point about that being, that it's all well and good suggesting that parents get involved in fisticuffs - but a) it's not really the answer (it won't work for everybody, nor would be available for everybody) b) people doing Chopper's own profession, may well get involved, these days (whether they would like to, or otherwise).

Like many, I rose above an unpleasant few years - but not everybody will or can. The problem - like so many of these softer crimes - is insufficient will and effort to do anything, really, other than pay lip service, talk about initiatives and feelings.


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 06, 2013 7:17 pm 
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Alison wrote:
...these are what children of today need to keep up with their friends and they should be able to use them safely and not be forced off because of some little sh*t.

Alison


That's just it, NO they don't!

They are just willing victims of of the shallow, marketing-led society we live in today; it's coming to something when foreign holiday bookings are down by 25% on this time last year BECAUSE THE KIDS WON'T GO IF THERE ISN'T GOOD ENOUGH WI-FI TO ALLOW THEM TO SPEND THE WHOLE HOLIDAY GLUED TO THEIR F*CKING MOBILE PHONE PRATTING ABOUT ON FACEBOOK! :shock: :facepalm:

It's no wonder employers are glad to welcome immigrants with open arms when they are better qualified than our home-grown, wannabe trailer trash!

I feel so desperately sorry for the tragic subject of the OP that she won't go on to have the life she otherwise would have because this purile, mind-numbing, vacuous rubbish has worked it's insidious way into the modern psyche...


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 06, 2013 7:34 pm 
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We_are_Stevo wrote:
Alison wrote:
...these are what children of today need to keep up with their friends and they should be able to use them safely and not be forced off because of some little sh*t.

Alison


That's just it, NO they don't!

They are just willing victims of of the shallow, marketing-led society we live in today; it's coming to something when foreign holiday bookings are down by 25% on this time last year BECAUSE THE KIDS WON'T GO IF THERE ISN'T GOOD ENOUGH WI-FI TO ALLOW THEM TO SPEND THE WHOLE HOLIDAY GLUED TO THEIR F*CKING MOBILE PHONE PRATTING ABOUT ON FACEBOOK! :shock: :facepalm:

It's no wonder employers are glad to welcome immigrants with open arms when they are better qualified than our home-grown, wannabe trailer trash!

I feel so desperately sorry for the tragic subject of the OP that she won't go on to have the life she otherwise would have because this purile, mind-numbing, vacuous rubbish has worked it's insidious way into the modern psyche...


You're missing the point.

People have always been bullied. Quite likely people always will be - because there's always some that will seek to, and probably never sufficient will / impetus / drive to very much reduced it. Social network - at least where this is concerned, is a means to an end.

Which does rather lead me on to an aside about my distaste for it, largely - in that networking used to be a means to an end - the means by which we made contact, the end being some true contact or social interaction - not meta-social-interaction. But now social networking is an end in it's own right. Some people live to vicariously (or otherwise) "live" or portray their life through social networking, rather than use social networking to augment their life / social interaction.

But that's really by-the-by. People were bullied before social networking, and would still be bullied without it (and, no doubt, still are).


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