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 Post subject: Sorry in advance.....
PostPosted: Fri Feb 01, 2013 12:25 pm 
retrobike rider
retrobike rider
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Joined: Thu Aug 28, 2008 1:01 pm
Posts: 1164
Location: Lurking in the bushes at the bottom of your mums garden....
Someone told me if you smack a fish before frying it, the meat will taste fresher.
What a load of codswallop.

Why did the Romanian stop reading for the night?
To give his Bucharest.

I work in McDonald's and a customer was rude to me today, so I got him back by not putting any Coke in his drink.
Just ice was served.

I ate a couple of Scotch eggs earlier.
The nurse in the Aberdeen fertility clinic looked horrified.

My county council has banned all carnivals in the area until further notice.
It's so unfair


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 01, 2013 1:06 pm 
Karma Queen / Cake Meisterin
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Joined: Thu Jul 27, 2006 10:02 pm
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Location: North Yorkshire
:lol: :lol: :lol: :facepalm: Do you have your coat to hand

Alison


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 01, 2013 1:11 pm 
Classified Mod
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Joined: Wed Dec 30, 2009 8:34 pm
Posts: 12694
Location: Fife in Scotland
:lol:


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 01, 2013 7:24 pm 
Old School Grand Master
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Joined: Thu Jul 19, 2007 7:18 pm
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Location: Staffordshire
Milton Jones?


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 01, 2013 7:35 pm 
Karma Queen / Cake Meisterin
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Location: North Yorkshire
Iwasgoodonce wrote:
Milton Jones?


Can't cope with Milton Jones

Alison


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 01, 2013 7:45 pm 
eBay Outing Master
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I did hear Al and Simon Cowell are entering into a partnership for a new show called.....Al Idol

Is this thread the auditions?


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 01, 2013 9:20 pm 
Gold Trader / MacRetro rider
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Joined: Sun May 25, 2008 11:03 am
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Location: Sunny Glasgow
:lol: :lol: oh dear


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PostPosted: Sat Feb 02, 2013 12:18 am 
retrobike rider
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Location: Lurking in the bushes at the bottom of your mums garden....
I am partial to Milton Jones. My favourite gag by Milton....

Words are very powerful things, for example, a single letter H can attract helicopters. It has to be a big one though. I wasted weeks watching that hot tap.


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PostPosted: Sat Feb 02, 2013 1:55 am 
Karma Queen / Cake Meisterin
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Joined: Thu Jul 27, 2006 10:02 pm
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Location: North Yorkshire
It seems a young farm boy accidentally overturned his wagon load of corn. The farmer who lived nearby heard the noise.

"Hey Willis!!" the farmer yelled. "Forget your troubles. Come in and eat dinner with us. Then I'll help you get the wagon back up."

"That's mighty nice of you," Willis answered, "but I don't think Pa would like me to."

"Nonsense, come on!" the farmer insisted.

"Well, okay," the boy finally agreed, "but Pa won't like it."

After a hearty dinner, Willis thanked his host. "I feel a lot better now, but I know Pa is going to be real upset."

"Don't be foolish!" the neighbour said with a smile. "By the way, where is your Pa?"

"Under the wagon."

Merry is the joke

Alison


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PostPosted: Sat Feb 02, 2013 10:56 am 
Old School Grand Master
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Joined: Wed Jul 25, 2007 2:04 pm
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Location: Completely in the dark, thanks to me good mate Terry....
sylus wrote:
I did hear Al and Simon Cowell are entering into a partnership for a new show called.....Al Idol


Didn't know anything about that myself, although still in the entertainment world I did recently read about an orchestra conductor whose GP signed him off work for a few weeks. Apparently it was due to excessive Strauss in the workplace.

:oops:

David


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