Retrobike Forum Index

It is currently Fri Dec 09, 2016 11:19 am

* Login   * Register * Search  * FAQ



Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 6 posts ] 
Author Message
 Post subject: 50 shed's of grey
PostPosted: Thu Nov 15, 2012 11:52 am 
Old School Grand Master
User avatar

Joined: Sun Mar 14, 2010 3:07 pm
Posts: 4211
Location: London for my sin's
50 Sheds of Gray

Author Colin Grey recounting his love encounters at the bottom of the Garden. Here are some extracts...

Fifty Sheds Of Grey

We tried various positions - round the back, on the side, up against a Wall... But in the end we came to the conclusion the bottom of the garden was the Only place for a good shed.

She stood before me, trembling in my shed.
"I'm yours for the night,
" she gasped, "You can do whatever you want with Me."
So I took her to Nando's.

She knelt before me on the shed floor and tugged gently at first, then Harder until finally it came.
I moaned with pleasure. Now for the other boot.

Ever since she read THAT book, I've had to buy all kinds of ropes, chains And shackles.
She still manages to get into the shed, though.

"Put on this rubber suit and mask," I instructed, calmly.
"Mmmm, kinky!" she purred.
"Yes," I said, "You can't be too careful with all that asbestos in the shed Roof."

"I'm a very naughty girl," she said, biting her lip. "I need to be
Punished."
So I invited my mum to stay for the weekend.

"Harder!" she cried, gripping the workbench tightly. "Harder!"
"Okay," I said. "What's the gross national product of Nicaragua?"

I lay back exhausted, gazing happily out of the shed window.
Despite my concerns about my inexperience, my rhubarb had come up a treat.

"Are you sure you can take the pain?" she demanded, brandishing stilettos.
"I think so," I gulped. "Here we go, then," she said, and showed me the Receipt.

"Hurt me!" she begged, raising her skirt as she bent over my workbench.
"Very well," I replied. "You've got fat ankles and no dress sense."

"Are you sure you want this?" I asked. "When I'm done, you won't be able to sit down for weeks."
She nodded.
"Okay," I said, putting the three-piece suite on eBay.

"Punish me!" she cried. "Make me suffer like only a real man can!"
"Very well," I replied, leaving the toilet seat up.

"Pleasure and pain can be experienced simultaneously," she said, gently Massaging my back as we listened to her Coldplay CD.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Nov 15, 2012 12:35 pm 
Retro Guru
User avatar

Joined: Thu Nov 03, 2011 8:30 pm
Posts: 580
Location: PT-LX
a must see

http://www.goodreads.com/review/show/340987215


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Nov 15, 2012 12:52 pm 
Old School Grand Master
User avatar

Joined: Wed Jul 25, 2007 2:04 pm
Posts: 3364
Location: Completely in the dark, thanks to me good mate Terry....
There's clearly good money to make out of this "badly written supermarket p*rn" lark. Although I've yet to start work on my own effort, possibly based on a New Labour theme and entitled Fifty Shades of Brown.... ;)

David


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Nov 15, 2012 1:51 pm 
retrobike rider / Gold Trader
retrobike rider / Gold Trader
User avatar

Joined: Thu Feb 24, 2011 1:15 am
Posts: 1887
Location: Getting fitter, I will beat the Surrey Hills....
This makes me laugh every time:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5K1RcKJVbHA


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Nov 15, 2012 2:04 pm 
Gold Trader / PoTM Winner
Gold Trader / PoTM Winner
User avatar

Joined: Mon Aug 08, 2011 2:35 pm
Posts: 2786
:lol: BRILLIANT :lol:

G


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Nov 15, 2012 5:30 pm 
Retro Guru
User avatar

Joined: Mon Dec 06, 2010 9:20 pm
Posts: 1087
Location: Chained to the mash tun.
top effort sir!!


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 6 posts ] 

All times are UTC [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: CristiRD and 11 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  

About Us

Follow Retrobike

Other cool stuff

All content © 2005-2015 Retrobike unless otherwise stated.
Cookies Policy.
bikedeals - the best bike deals in one place
FatCOGS - Fat Chance Owner's Group

Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group