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 Post subject: Divorce
PostPosted: Wed Sep 13, 2017 10:07 pm 
Gold Trader
Gold Trader
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Joined: Wed Apr 28, 2010 1:41 pm
Posts: 997
Location: Worcestershire
Hello RB world.

Her indoors has decided to call last orders on our marriage after 16 years.

I won't bother to explain the reasons as they are difficult to think about and are currently causing me much pain.

I need some simple pointers, tips, advice etc for what to consider in our separation and divorce.

I know its not an easy subject to discuss, but I know that I am not the first and won't be the last, and I'm dam sure I'm not the only one going through this kind of S**t at the moment who frequents the RB pages.

Any and all advice is welcome.

Thanks.


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 Post subject: Re: Divorce
PostPosted: Wed Sep 13, 2017 10:14 pm 
GOLD | PoTM | Rider | rBOTM
GOLD | PoTM | Rider | rBOTM
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Joined: Tue Feb 26, 2013 6:26 pm
Posts: 19755
Location: 54 Festive Road Winchcombe GLOUCS Yarp...
Children? First consideration.


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 Post subject: Re:
PostPosted: Wed Sep 13, 2017 10:43 pm 
Old School Grand Master
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Joined: Wed Apr 12, 2006 12:33 pm
Posts: 11842
Location: The Home Of Mountain Biking, And All Great Things.
Consult a lawyer. Don't wait. Advice from a bunch of middle ages folks who waste their time and money on old bikes is probably not what you really need. Mediation is the key, whether the split is irreconcilable or not.

Children are resilient, so make your needs the primary concern. Only when your needs are met can children be happy with the end result.


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 Post subject: Re: Divorce
PostPosted: Thu Sep 14, 2017 12:05 am 
King of the DuckBoard
King of the DuckBoard
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Joined: Sun Jan 28, 2007 12:30 pm
Posts: 22932
Location: Is not a retrobike rider
I was told by a lawyer. Don't get one as it will drag on a cost a ££££ I did my own cost £350 and took 3 months. The lawyer told me you both have to agree and keep to the agreement.


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 Post subject: Re:
PostPosted: Thu Sep 14, 2017 7:59 am 
Old School Grand Master
Old School Grand Master
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Joined: Wed Aug 08, 2007 10:35 am
Posts: 12825
Location: Penarth
Been there twice. Hard times mate, sorry to hear it.
First consideration is obviously if you have any children and their age and stage.
Next is how you think you and your partner are going to deal with this. Lawyers get very expensive.


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 Post subject: Re: Divorce
PostPosted: Thu Sep 14, 2017 8:26 am 
Retro Guru
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Joined: Sun Feb 08, 2015 8:51 am
Posts: 1605
Location: Macclesfield, Cheshire
sad times. Best advice I can offer (having watched friends go through it rather than be there myself) is try to be reasonable with eachother. If you can remain civil it makes everything easier and compromise / agreement can be reached. If not then hard times acomin, sorry.

best wishes


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 Post subject: Re: Divorce
PostPosted: Thu Sep 14, 2017 2:26 pm 
Retro Guru
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Joined: Wed Apr 12, 2006 4:23 pm
Posts: 2682
Location: leicester
DIY one worked well for me,£350 or something like that but will only work if there are no kids and both are amicable about house profits etc.


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 Post subject: Re:
PostPosted: Thu Sep 14, 2017 5:37 pm 
retrobike rider
retrobike rider

Joined: Sun Nov 14, 2010 8:21 pm
Posts: 663
Location: Ripon
Best advice I can give is be cool and listen ,don't say too much,
All so don't go in for heated arguments
You make it through the storm and out into the sunshine its great.


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 Post subject: Re:
PostPosted: Thu Sep 14, 2017 5:56 pm 
Gold Trader / MacRetro rider
Gold Trader / MacRetro rider

Joined: Thu May 06, 2010 10:05 pm
Posts: 6619
Location: Aberdeen
If you're still on talking terms then it helps, a lot. You might be able to work most of the issues surrounding the divorce (children/finances etc) out between the two of you and keep the lawyers involvement to a minimum (which is in the best interests of all involved really).

Have a good look at the Wikivorce website.

If things have really gone bad between you then get legal advice, to protect yourself and find out what options you have.


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 Post subject: Re:
PostPosted: Thu Sep 14, 2017 8:33 pm 
Old School Grand Master
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Joined: Wed Apr 12, 2006 12:33 pm
Posts: 11842
Location: The Home Of Mountain Biking, And All Great Things.
Most law forms will offer an initial free consultation.

Even a half hour with an expert can save you thousands long term.


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