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PostPosted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 11:06 pm 
National & North West AEC
National & North West AEC
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Joined: Mon Nov 03, 2008 12:43 am
Posts: 8146
Location: Macclesfield Forest
Has to go down as another very memorable and enjoyable Mountain Mayhem with everyone from Retrobike.

Undoubtedly the enduring memory will be the several weeks of inclement weather which turned the whole venue into an utter mudbath.
The rivers of slurry were at least preferable to the thick claggy wheel stopping stuff in the woods. Heavy overnight rain at least made parts of the course rideable.
The campsite was almost as bad...

But once again the RB trackside heckling tents were superbly placed and populated by a fine group of people and Heathy. The heckling was legendary and surely appreciated by all the riders as they passed.
Classics such as "Come on the beard", "Go on Barry", "Nice knapsack" and "You can't climb on cheese" made an appearance.
I also remember "Turn that frown upside down", "Come on it's not a race" closely followed by "Come on it's a race!" and "Actung! Zis bike does not comply with the necessary safety specifications, you must stop immeadiately" at the faux Germanic heckle section.

All this was accompanied by a very loud sound system and sets from Makster, Gump and Mrkawasaki. The light show and smoke machine made the RB tented village stand out head and shoulders above the rest of the campsite.

In terms of the 'racing', over the 'captain's breakfast' my four man team of chimps quickly decided on a two lap each strategy due to the atrocious conditions. We achieved this despite Mr K's bizarre decision to take on the course a second time at midnight during the heaviest bursts of rain.
I fully expected to see his internal mechanism broken and lost in the orange swill, but apparently he quite enjoyed it.

As mentioned the course was a little wet in places. Consistently throughout the weekend the worst parts by far were the arena sections. The rest of the course varied depending on how wet or dry it was. The wet soupy gloop was much nicer to ride than the drier clarty clay, despite hiding a multitude of bumps and holes beneath it's apparently smooth surface.
In the places though the earth would clog the wheels up within a wheel rotation necessitating cat sized clumps to be clutched and poked out from the frame and bottom bracket.

My final lap started with a nightmarish first half where I was forced to drag my bike though the woods while pounds of earth weighed it down and generally made it unrideable.
The second half was much better though as I chatted with Rory Hitchins, Isla Rowntree and then Nick Craig on the climb up to the monument.
At the top I met EdEdwards whom I hoped would have some jelly babies to perk me up with. Instead he shook up a can of lager and sprayed it in my face.
I took a few gulps and then chased down Daj and Grannygrinder before the final slippery descent back into the campsite and around to complete the lap.

Now I'm home, my clothes are soaking in big bucket before I dare ruin the washing machine. As the Malvern mud is washed away tomorrow I'm sure there will be plenty more to add as every detail is remembered.

Thanks to everyone for coming along and battling through to make it another brilliant event.


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 11:11 pm 
National & North West AEC
National & North West AEC
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Joined: Mon Nov 03, 2008 12:43 am
Posts: 8146
Location: Macclesfield Forest
tintin40 wrote:
That would be a first. Hasn't it always been muddy?


Last year was okay, 2010 was dry and dusty.

Except plasticine woods.
To quote Rory Hitchins: "Plasticine woods is always shit."


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 11:18 pm 
iconoclassic best in show
iconoclassic best in show
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Joined: Mon Feb 28, 2011 12:30 am
Posts: 2417
Location: Derby
Great weekend thoroughly enjoyed myself and Mrs Cosmic has done me proud with some excellent pics which I shall seadily spend years resizing
I was lucky enough to be riding from 9.15 - 11.45 in the torrential rain so avoided the blockages.
Thanks to all who made this happen it was a great spirit in the Retrobike Favella with great sounds and beer ,thanks Spencer Cant tell you how good it was to come down out of the woods and ride past you guys :D


Attachments:
Mountain Mayhem 2012 011 #2476 Beer.JPG
Mountain Mayhem 2012 011 #2476 Beer.JPG [ 459.24 KiB | Viewed 2062 times ]
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PostPosted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 11:46 pm 
North Wales AEC / OWMTBC 2010 Champion
North Wales AEC / OWMTBC 2010 Champion
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Joined: Sun May 11, 2008 10:13 pm
Posts: 6066
Location: Chester
Mixed event for me, certainly memorable though.
The best heckle had to be "go bin man" shortly before the rider binned it on the slippery turn outside the retrobike tent.

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PostPosted: Mon Jun 25, 2012 12:53 am 
Section Moderator & South West AEC
Section Moderator & South West AEC
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Joined: Mon Jun 25, 2007 3:33 pm
Posts: 8171
Location: new forest
wow! what a few days!!

my story begins arriving on wednesday and pitching camp in blazing sun. little did i know the horror ahead of me!! the guv and rekiborter soon arrived and we set up base camp, aided with beer! camp beds soon beckoned but then came the rain, the wind and the indignity of deciding that the gazebo was simply not enough against the rain, i decamped to the safety of the van which turned out to be a much better bedroom!!

thursday came, people started arriving en-masse, the field started getting boggy. we legged it to Ledbury for a curry and a beer, checked online using our phones in the pub, yes we were those iphone tossers in the pub ignoring eachother because of the internet!

back to camp and some more beer, friday came and went as people arrived and pitched their tents . . . in the rain and wind!

race day came and i donned the suit, i have been meaning to buy a new suit for ages, it's old but my only suit, all interviews, weddings, funerals etc have been in that suit from the last 10 years!! this now forces me to get a new suit for a wedding in october!!

on the start line i told Rob Lee (awesome enduro racer) that he took it all too seriously, not even a smile in return, Nick Craig on the other hand adjusted my tie for me!! Legend!!

the lap itself, the run was painful so became a jog then a walk with Tedc, alot more gentlemanly! then we got to the bikes and i left the Ninja Turtle for dust (well, gloop!) i rolled round to the kenda climb and got up the entire thing and at that point i realised just how hard the lap ahead was going to be but also how much encouragement i was gonna get for wearing a suit!!

when asked why i was wearing the suit the most common reply was i am off to court/interview/on my daily commute etc. coming towards the lezyne bridge (1st pass the retrobike tent) someone stalled on the hill infront of me forcing me to dismount, at which point i got complimented on the suit, i asked for pimms, they gave me red wine and a bottle of becks! i then headed for the bridge, stopped to talk to the ninja turtles team mate then downed the beer and launched at the lezyne bridge to an awesome cheer from the heckle tent!! awesome!!!

after that the lap was harder because of the hills but eventually i got towards the last downhill, just before this i was overtaken by an elite rider with the usual lack of sense of humour call of "elite rider on your left!!" i followed him down the descent where he fell off in the bomb hole!! i went passed shouting "upper management on your right!!" made me laugh!!

then i passed the heckling tent again and was welcomed with a lot of cheering, you guys were amazing!!

eventually i came round to the start/finish line, i have never been happier to see heathy!!! but god did i get some stick for an almost 3 hour lap!! but then i wasn't that far behind others so i felt better when i heard their times!

after that epic lap the tactics were changed to "do what you can when you can" meaning binning nights laps and starting up again in the morning.

i'd like to thank:-

my team, makster, heathy, graveymonster, nick, andy(GA rider), bob (man in pink), the Guv. LEGENDS ALL OF YOU!

the guv, makster, mr k, DJ App for the sound and light show

everyone who cheered, jeered and heckled

spencer for the beer

theredchilli and cannondaleking and harrycrumb as start line mates!

andy for the pure comedy that the intruder brought!

and anyone else i have forgot!!

awesome amazing weekend

here is a link to my photobucket album , there are about 130 pics starting from this link, i don't know if you can right click save them should you want any but if not PM me and i'll send you the file by email.

http://s929.photobucket.com/albums/ad13 ... 1QQtppZZ20


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Jun 25, 2012 1:39 am 
Section Moderator & South West AEC
Section Moderator & South West AEC
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Joined: Mon Jun 25, 2007 3:33 pm
Posts: 8171
Location: new forest
ted c
http://www.flickr.com/photos/brf/7428679162/

TGR
http://www.flickr.com/photos/brf/7428877252/

neil__j ?
http://www.flickr.com/photos/brf/7428939296/


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Jun 25, 2012 8:05 am 
retrobike rider / Gold Trader
retrobike rider / Gold Trader

Joined: Thu May 07, 2009 6:42 am
Posts: 1525
Location: Mostly West Midlands
What an amazing weekend.

Friday Arrival
My first time at Mayhem (retro or otherwise), arrived late morning on Friday to be met by many of the usual suspects from the national series rides. One walk to the Retrobike camp and back to car - walking boots and gaiters or wellies were the footwear of choice, so as no wellies, just pleased I'd thrown the boots and gaiters in as a last minute "well, the worst is I'll drive them to Mayhem and back".

So tent pitched (ta for help peeps), and time to get my bearings - off to the Beer Tent (much thanks to Spencer), for some reason no one wanted to do a course reccie. :D

Damp day turned into damp night and big BBQ and tunes (ta to Mr Chef - sorry didn't catch your name).

Race - Day 1
Team 4 of 10 decided that I'd make an ideal candidate for being first up (if only I'd known what I was letting myself in for). Ta to Tad for taking me up to the start and explaining what happens - the nerves had set in.

On the start line, and it's getting busy...twelve midday arrives and we're off, can barely remember the last time I ran anywhere, let alone in a competitive setting, caught up with Jon in his suit, and a turtle and proceeded at a gentlemanly paced walk back to the bikes. Collect the explosif and we're off - walking again - no riding until you reach the start line...so pick-up bike and get commentatered that my retro-bike is too nice to get dirty - no its just easier to carry it than push, and frankly it set the riding style tone for much of the lap.

After what seems like an age of pushing/carrying/removing mud and occasional riding started the drag up toward the bridge, thank you for all the cheers/heckles/etc - it really helped with the push over the bridge.

Bridge done, it's off for the second half of the lap...much as the first half but a greater variety mud types - not just "clarty". By this stage the fast guys were starting to come through and lap the more gentlemanly/ladylike paced riders. Was strangely satisfying to look behind and see a "fast runner with bike" rather than a fast rider. :D

Finally reach the start of the final decent back to pass through the campsite - once again thanks for the cheers/heckles/etc when coming through the retrobike zone.

Back to the handover point, find TGR, handover the cleaning stick - far more use than anything else - and I'm done, utterly...must have been the toughest ten miles I've done on a bike.

Time to get cleaned up, and back to the heckling/cheering/etc at RBHQ.

Even more rain (making the fact at home there is still a hosepipe ban even more surreal), a few beers, german heckling - Kartoffel Kopf, Show us your raceface, Grrrr...

The Guv'nor very much with his race face on...grrrr
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Race - Day 2
Up early-ish and there's still people plugging round - much respect due, especially the solo riders...

More german heckling...
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Twelve o'clock rolls round and it's over - well nearly, at guess some people weren't going to be finishing for another two hours at least. Snuck off to get team medals, and finish packing the car.

An awesome weekend I don't think I'll ever forget...

Loads more picture here:
http://s864.photobucket.com/albums/ab201/Ted_C/2012%20Retrobike%20Series/Mayhem/?start=all

A small selection:
RB HQ
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No garage queen here
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Modern stuff didn't fare any better
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Broken bike, but not a broken man
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Last edited by BerthaPog on Mon Jun 25, 2012 5:19 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Mon Jun 25, 2012 8:23 am 
Retro Guru
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Joined: Wed Jan 28, 2009 11:50 pm
Posts: 1392
Location: Where ever the beer (or Vodka) flows.
Had a great weekend, despite the weather. Here's a few pics :D
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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Jun 25, 2012 9:42 am 
98+ Moderator
98+ Moderator
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Joined: Thu May 05, 2011 10:53 pm
Posts: 4098
Location: Single Speeding in the Capital of the FoD,UK
Top weekend despite the weather , nice to be back racing at Eastnor after a 22 year gap !!
Highlights we're many including :

Retrobike beer, cheers Spence - I think had the weather not been so bad the two barrels would have lasted more than one afternoon :shock:
Winning a set of kenda tyres and a tube
Daj finishing his lap on the daewoo
Retrobike start line tactics
At the startline realising I had flat shoes = no grip
Scooby doo style run ( see above no grip)
Jonnyboy666 "court" suit
The love of retrobikes during my lap
Finishing a lap
The best heckling tent in the world
Oh and you guys


:D


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Jun 25, 2012 9:49 am 
retrobike rider / Gold Trader
retrobike rider / Gold Trader
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Joined: Tue Nov 03, 2009 2:43 pm
Posts: 12370
Location: At the pinnacle of fuckwittery
Another fantastaic weekend, in the true RB spirit of things.

So many individuals to thank, but as there's no i in team, its only fitting that EVERYONE gets a thankyou for making the highlight of the RB calendar.

Retrobike beer is a bit special,

Smoke machine across the track

German heckling

JB666 in a suit getting confused for the 'fast' guy from last year

daj on the Daewoo of death

Gravy's rat-look Kona 8) was a touch of inspirational class.

"show us yer war face - - - - - - - - that's not your war face"

Looking like I'd been out for a lap, even tho I'd just gone down for a curry

EdEdwards explaining the meaning of 'docking' amongst others

...... just a few of the highlights for me.




After standing in the sun yesterday, for a couple of hours before we left, I now have sunburn... :shock: :shock: :shock: in contrast to the Mudfest that this year's event had become.

Roll on next year when we double in numbers once again, and require yet more heckling space.. 8) 8)


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