A spoke tension meter helps here. I do not believe that you can judge spoke tension accuratley by feel alone. You can get in the ball park though. The spoke tension meter comes in very useful to ensure even spoke tension. This is essential for the longevity of the wheel. To do wheel building I have bought a Park TS2.2 with the dial guages (dial guages are not essential but they help getting a wheel down to 0.1mm lateral/radial movement), a dishing tool, spoke keys, nipple driver and a spoke tension meter. At retail this is all very expensive. Worthwhile even for the home mechanic if you have several bikes and wil be building wheels for all of them and for any future purchases.
The home truing stand that Park make is a lot cheaper but you have to keep on flippiing the wheel over to true it.
I would recomend getting familair with truing first before wheel building. Then release all spoke tension and see if you can re-tenstion the wheel and keep it round, true and dished. Then try lacing.
http://www.parktool.com/blog/repair-hel ... im-service
Sheldons guide is pretty good.
I don't know anything about those sspokes posted in that link but I only use Sapim's spokes and nipples as they simpley brilliant. Sapims nipples do not distort unlike some of the cheaper nipples at proper spoke tension. A box of 100 Spaim Race spokes + nipples costs £40. Plenty of people sell them individulaly including me.
DT Swiss also make excellent spokes but Madison is so expensive that I stick with Sapims products.
ALAN Competitizone 1980-1981, Traitor Exile, Pinarello Monvisio, Trek 2300 (the one with the carbon tubes), Scott Pro Racing, Vitus 992, Kinesis FF29, Sannino, Trek 8900, Genesis Equilibrium Ti Disc, Gary Fisher Ferrous single speed, 1948 raleigh record ace project, Klein Quantum, Ceilo Rosso TT bike, 1962 dawes unknown model.http://www.thecycleclinic.co.uk